Tuesday, 14 February 2017

Percy - Ana Chronicles - XV: Crab Cakes on Valentine's Day

Because it's February 14th, and also because, why not? A Percy-Ana bit on the subject of True Love.
-- "It's Valentine's Day!" "I know, three department stores, four gyms and at least one cake shops have all sent me texts with special offers." "So, uh...like, Happy Valentine's Day? Is that something one says?" "Thank you. I, unlike your selfish self, want you to be happy on all days, so I won't wish you back." "That's unfair! Of course I wish you to be happy on all days." "What about nights? What about my sex life? I am an emancipated modern woman, and I demand that my right to a sexually satisfying relationship is respected." "Uh...no one's even dreaming of denying you your right to a..." "You did! You just did!" "But, my very dear one, the person who benefits most from you being sexual satisfied is me, since I am...you know, the one who...you're just being difficult because you like pulling my leg, aren't you?" "Maaaaaybe. Besides, your 'Ana is being difficult' face is cute." "Right. Anyway, there's a Valentine's special at the fancy Thai place on Pearl street. Shall we go there?" "Yes, let's. What's special about their menu today?" "Heart-shaped crab-cakes." "This I've got to see." "And I've got to eat." "How are we paying for this, though?" "Don't you have any money? I thought you did!" "I have...five dollars and forty-eight cents. Paid the gym membership yesterday." "I've got three dollars. Paid the rent." "So...no fancy heart-shaped crab cakes?" "I guess not." "Oh well, I'll fire up the blender. Banana smoothie?" "Ugh. Yes, I suppose." "Cheer up. We can always got sit on that bench by the creek when the moon is up. That's romantic." "And I suppose that's still free." "True love, you see, always is." "Even if heart-shaped crab cakes are not." "I'm beginning to think you love crab cakes more than me. Why don't you just go and wish a Happy Valentine's Day to the crabs?" "What, I never...I like *eating* them, which is quite different from..." "..." "Right. Point taken. Smoothie. Creek. Bench. Moon." "And then, if things go well, my right to a sexually..." "Yes, yes, of course." "Because true love is free." "Because true love is, as you rightly say, free." --

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